QUOTES! Immortalised for all to see!

[Kae]

I CAN'T BELIEVE I HAVEN'T POSTED HERE YET! I HAVE SO MANY!


*in Mc Donalds*
Me: "She has anorexic FEET!"


*while my sister and I were dancing red-neck style*
Me: "Don't punch my elbow while you're sawing!"


Buddy: "Then I must say adieu! For my sis is standing nearby looking at meeee. With eeeeyes."
Me: "No, with elbows."


*referring to a Fast and Furious film*
Sister: "That movie was just some japanese people, a rat and a bucket on some guy's belly."


*the weather man, LIVE ON AIR!*
"There will be shattered scowers today with a little fist and mog."


My sister: "SMELL MY LEG!!"
Brother:"Get away from me you weirdo!"
Sister: "What does it smell like?! Just smell it!"
Brother: " NO! .........COCONUTS!"


Friend's Drunken Uncle: *points at nipples* "But all boys have them!"


Me: "What is the circumference of a MOOSE?"
Buddy: "Big."


Buddy: "Killing people makes me happy!"
*religion teachers walk around corner*


Buddy: "Mum, I'm deadly serious. Next time you leave me there for 2 and a half f**kin hours I'm gonna put all your shoes in the bath and light them on fire!"

[wolfie]

''Did you know dolphins are just gay sharks *head nods*''

''Sometimes I forget my middle name''
Blonde cheerleader outta glee

But they are

[Kae]

*taken COMPLETELY OUT OF CONTEXT*
My sister: "I wanna get Jude Law, and give it to him. Or put it on his ass and make him dance."

*a few seconds later*
My Sister: "Come on, Betsy! Don't be eating my belly, now!"



*From an episode of Supernatural. Sam in a bar*

Randomer: "Do you wanna get out of here?"
Sam: "But I like this bar, and I just bought this drink."
Randomer: "I mean do you wanna get out of here with ME?"
Sam: ".... OH! You mean The S*x??
Randomer: ".... Yes."
Sam: "Coz I would love to do The S*x with you."


Talking RolePlays on MSN. Zehel = Me Foxy Flames = Buddy

~Zehel~ says:
Right enough, I don't know what I would do with my character in GW4.... All his friends are going to die in GW3.....
Foxy Flames says:
*isn't it obvious?
~Zehel~ says:
*NO
*NOT BAD GUY
Foxy Flames says:
*Live in a swampy marshland where he raises children to eat to sustain his youth... like kurogane only with less class and real Estate
*Oh... right


Sister: "I'm SENSIBLE!"
Brother: "Is that why you've been running around pretending to be a llama and spitting on people all morning?"


Brother: "Oh my god.... There are Germans in there aswell! This is NOT gonna go down well...."

[wolfie]

''I took all my anti-biotics at once and forget how to leave the leave the room''

Brittany from glee

So dumb yet so true.

[Hellsnextboss]

Friend: That may or may not be true
Me: Yeah, thanks for clearing that up for me. -_-

That phrase annoys me.
XD

[wolfie]

A woman once commented on Churchill being drunk. Old woman''Sir you are drunk!'' Churchill ''Yes I am drunk and you are ugly, but the differance is in the morning I'll be sober but you'll still be ugly.''

[wolfmoon]

Family Guy quotes ^.^

Peter: Brian there's something wrong with my alphabet soup! Look it sats "Oooo".
Brian: Peter those are Cheerios.

Peter: Quagmire you gotta help us, we pissed off a bunch of ghosts and now our house is gone and we got no place to stay.
Quagmire: Uh Peter this is not the best time.
Women's Voice in Background: Glen, are you coming?
Quagmire: Uh yeah honey I'll be right there. Waaa waaa! I'll be right there. Uh Peter I'm really slammed right now, can you give me the short version?
Peter: Uh... what eh... what's going on in there?
Quagmire: Nothing.
*A woman riding a donkey and a naked man on a tractor pass by in the background*
Quagmire: So eh as you can see my family's here. And eh, its game night. We're playing....... Sex.
*slams door*

Stewie: Cool whhip

[Kae]

Moare:



*in the FanFiction I'm reading*
Lavi: 'Rawr! Yuu-chan, meow! Naked! Mine! Hiss!'


Me: "Closet monster... This Armaghetto tastes like burning...?"


Brother: "Nom-Con is gay."
Me: "You're gay!"
Brother: "What's your point?"



Sister: *on msn* "BRB, mah hands are kinda covered in moisturiser ATM. BECAUSE THAT IS HAOW I MURDER MWAHAHAHA! *cough cough* ...That damn blood makes mah skin so darn dry..."



Me: "My body just wants me to be gay!! ...No, My ear wants me to be gay!!"


Sister: "Oh no wait, I cant go eyebrow hunting today, I've got to mind Evie."
Seven-year-old Brother: *loads toy shotgun* "Meh, see ya tomorrow!"


And last but not least....

Sister on Omegle:
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: RAAAAWWWRR
You: FEAR ME
Stranger: AHHH
You: THAT'S WHAT I THUNK
Stranger: slaeigh you!
Stranger: thunk?
You:
You: NEVAAAAARR
You: whatever
Stranger: asl?
You: OH MAN NO YOU DIDNT
You: DID YOU JUST ASK ME ASL??
Stranger: i asked ur muma for hers
You: asl? i hate the word, as i hate hell, all montagues and thee. have at thee, coward!
Stranger: o k obviously have way too much time on ya hands dn ya!
Your conversational partner has disconnected.


I may make a seperate topic for funny omegle conversations...

[fr1zz1y]

"Don't let anyone touch you,but you can touch yourself"-haha my dance teacher was epic.

[Kae]

*at reception on the ferry last night*
Me: "Sorry, I was wondering, if I want to use the Wi-Fi later, is there a code I need?"
Man: "....Cheese?"
Me: "...The Wi-Fi?"
Man: "....Cheese?"
Other Man: "Sorry, he doesn't speak English, what do you need?"


Well, he sounded like he was saying cheese, anyway...

[Boneberry]

While i was in the states.

Co-Worker: Hey danny if you come back next year you have to bring me back some of that haggis stuff.

Me:....Sure i'll make a quick pit stop in SCOTLAND in my Magical Floating Castle for it.

------------------------

With my friend Timmy

Tim: Who needs friends when ya have a left hand anyways?

Me:........no......just no

[wolfie]

Zoe-"no ones askin you to go jayne"
Jayne-"good cuz i dont like these folkes much"
Zoe-"there whores"
Jayne- "im in"

[Kae]

Little Bro: "Where are all these zombies coming from?!"
Sister: "You see, when a mammy zombie and a daddy zombie love each other very much..."


Buddy: "NO LAVI/KANDA! Kanda's too much of an ass!"
Me: "SHUT UP. LAVI LOVES KANDA'S ASS."


Ricky Martin came on TV, and after he recently came out of the closet, me and my sister Rosie couldn't help watching Livin' La Vida Loca in an ENTIRELY different light...

Rosie: "This is so.. 'WOMEN! YEAH!', y'know?"
Me: "Hehehe, yeah."
Little Brother: "This was in Shrek 2."
Rosie: *horrified* "DONKEY!! Nooo!"
Me: "Don't you mean Puss? Wait...." *pulls terrified face and whispers* "Puss and Donkey?!?!"
Rosie: ".....ARGGGGHHHH!"



Croation Friend: "Get a haircut."
Brother: "Get a government."


Brother: *about Croation dude* "He has a crap name, too - Filip!"
Sister: "You have a crap name! Mark! You were named quick cause everyone thought you were gonna die!"
Brother: "......" *cries*

[TheBlueAlchemist]

Friend #1: Did you just say foxy? What are you a black person form the 70s?

Friend #2: Black people weren't around in the 70s

[Kae]

Me: "Do not compute!"
Sis: "The toilet?"
Me: "Yes! I dont understand the toilet."
Sis: "Are it's feelings too complex?"
Me: "Yes! It's speaking a language I'm not familiar with!"


Sis: "WHAT'S THIS?! NUDITY?! Oh right it's just Eminem..."

Me: "Bob, I think I swallowed something funky...."
Sis: "THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID"
Me: "AT THE GAY BAR, GAY BAR, GAY BAR!"

I should explain the 'At the gay bar' thing. I'm sure everyone's heard the Electric 6 song 'Gay Bar'. Well, my and my buddies have a thing, where if someone says something with even SLIGHT innuendo, and sometimes none whatsoever, we add 'At the GAY BAR, GAY BAR, GAY BAR!" in the tune of the song...